A Quick Explanation
This is a long month of stories, so I have collated them into multiples of 7 days, which I have called a week. The week does not start and end on the same day, for example it might start on a Thursday but because I skip a couple of days, it might end on the next Sunday. I guess what I am saying is a week in this journal entry is not necessarily a calendar week.
So, what I’ve done is make a special menu for each week. That way it will be easier to find things.
Day 1, Day 1.5, Day 2, Day 3, Day 4, Day 5, Day 6, Day 7
Day 1 – Wednesday 1st
After swapping litter boxes with the bunnies a couple of weeks ago, I decided that I should start proper bonding. I was so scared because I didn’t know what to expect. I had read stacks of stuff online about the do’s and don’ts, the horror stories, the simple “that was easy” stories…
No one ever tells you what really goes on. They give you things like:
- get a small area like a cardboard box, cover it with fabric so the bunnies can’t see out, then put them in there
- they hump for dominance
- if they run around and chase each other the bond will break, or never be created
- if they grunt and/or scream get them out of there asap
And then you hear stories about how they bonded their bunnies through extreme stress, like putting them in the clothes dryer and turning it on. That is disgusting, and people with those cruel ideas should themselves be put in a drier.
I read somewhere that there are several ways to bond bunnies, and it was something like this:
- Put them in a small area and wait for them to settle down, then progressively (over days or weeks) make the space bigger once they are settled and eating together
- Make a huge area/pen and let them do their thing
- Stress bond them in a rough long car ride
- Put them in a bath tub and let them chase each other
It does not make you feel good comparing yourself to others who think they understand all there is to know about a topic. Just don’t waste your time on it. They might be wrong for your particular situation. Just follow your instincts and if it seems wrong, then stop and rethink what you are doing. Use your logic and intuition because it really isn’t that complex. Don’t over think things.
I thought about bonding my bunnies in the bath tub, or in a cardboard box, or in a small section of their pen and progressively making it bigger, but it made me feel sick thinking about it for some reason. I think it was because I had other people in my house that would involve themselves in the process and either come up with brilliant ideas to help, want to pat the bunnies during the process, or get scared when they hear thumping or grunts and end up making more noise than the bunnies.
I disagree with stress bonding. I don’t even want to think about that.
So really, the only option that I could do was #2 make a huge pen and put them in there. But it worried me a little because even though Lunar was scenting Buttons’ body through the wire of the pen, it was a different thing being in the same physical space as him.
I decided that I was going to do it my own way, and what I think is right for my bunnies.
I will listen to people’s advice, but I know that my bunnies have been together for 4 months, separated by wire, so it shouldn’t be too much of a leap to put them together. It might change the dynamics a bit and being together in the same bubble will be different, but they know each other.
I know some people will think that this is cruel, it actually isn’t. It forms a stronger bond because the bunnies are given the space to figure themselves out.
Stop anthropomorphising your pets!
First, we decided that we will put Maple and Buttons together in a smallish pen.
They chased each other around a little bit, then it stopped.
Chasing is a natural rabbit behaviour. It is nothing to be scared of.
Buttons took control, and made Maple stayed away. She crept closer and closer to him ending up sniffing his nose, which he allowed for a few seconds. He then moved in a way to let her know not to come too close and he will let her know when he allows her come closer.
I stayed in the pen with them, just in case I needed to break them apart. Which never happened. Buttons sat at my feet letting Maple know that I belong to him. After a few minutes I gently moved away to another section of the pen, and Maple came up to me. Buttons watched closely.
There wasn’t any fighting. No grunting, screaming, nothing. Just racing around my legs and jumping over each other.
After a while they both laid down to rest. It was then, when they were starting to eat grass and chew, that I started to pat them carefully on the head. Chewing, or using their jaw, means they are calming themselves down. That means they are relaxing, relaxed enough to eat.
All of that took about 10-15 minutes.
Once they were calm, and I could pat them without them making any jerky movements, we separated them. I picked Maple up and gave her a hug for a couple of minutes, then put her back in her pen with Lunar, which changed the subject entirely.
I went back to get Buttons, he was a bit nervous. Not stressed. I picked him up and took him for a walk around the garden. I needed to make sure the subject changed for him too. I didn’t want to put him in his pen and leave him to figure it out by himself. He loved walking around the garden and smelling the gum tree flowers, booping random leaves with his nose, and sniffing the sweet smelling air. Once I put him back, he was happy and binkied.
Maple was nervous when she saw him again, she stayed as far away from him as she possibly could. I picked her up and went for a walk around the garden with her. We had a look at my veggie patch, and listened to the birds in the trees.
Emotions
After a situation like this, the emotions they feel at the end will be last thing they remember. It’s important to wait until they relax and then separate them, change the subject and help them relax further.
Chasing each other is not a bad thing. It is a rabbit behaviour. I’ve learned to not apply human emotions onto rabbit behaviour, because that’s what makes it easy to confuse what is going on.
Never anthropomorphise your rabbits, they are not human and do not have human emotions.
But saying that, you have to make sure you care for them and read how they are feeling.
If you want to know about anthropomorphism there’s an entire article about it in the Health Library.
Day 1.5 – Thursday, 2nd
We decided to try again, but with all three bunnies. I got the oven mits, dust pan and two towels ready. The towels make it easy to throw over a bunny if they get stressed and it will calm them down. The internet said to use oven mits if you have to break up a fight, it saves your hands getting hurt. The dustpan is there to push the bunnies apart if they don’t let go.
I’m calling this Day 1.5 because it’s only slightly progressing from the previous session.
I had to spend time with each bunny in the evening to get them to forgive me for my sins. I even had to play Lunar some bunny calming music – which really helped, he fell into a deep sleep for about 20 minutes until someone messaged me and the ding-ding woke him up.
To be honest, I thought it was going to be worse than what it was. It was scary and very nerve-wracking, and I didn’t really want to do it. But all of the bunnies are well behaved and didn’t want to hurt each other. I was worried that Buttons would get rough or Lunar would get nasty, but none of that happened. The worst that happened was they lost a little bit of hair in the process of racing around. They did get a little stressed, but nothing too bad. I was relieved that Maple had met Buttons a few days before, because that helped keep her calm and also helped Lunar stay reasonably calm.
These behaviours are apparently text-book bonding behaviours for a successful bond. Although it might take a long time to actually bond them (between 2 weeks – 2 months), their behaviour is positive.
The worst negative behaviour is circling, where the bunnies go round and round in a tight circle, like they are chasing each other’s tail. That is bad and and apparently that bond will never work… but I doubt it, it would just take a lot of time and patience.
Next time, I will make sure to spend time with them afterwards so I don’t get the blame for leaving and not making them happy again. Apparently, toys aren’t as good as a walk around the garden.
I won’t try again for a few days, giving them time to get over it and build synapses in their brains. It worked with Maple, she was fine with Buttons this time because she had a couple of days rest after her time with him. When separated, they will still be able to touch each other through the mesh, just like a normal day.
I have seen a change in Buttons, too. He has changed a lot. Once he lost his sister Cotton in October 2022, he was sad and anxious. I slowly introduced Maple and Lunar, at a distance, but Buttons ignored them. Then he met Chester, which did not go to plan. But Chester showed Buttons that there were more bunnies out there in the world, and from that Buttons began to accept Maple and Lunar a lot more. Even though Maple and Lunar were only a couple of months old at that stage, Buttons realised that he had little friends. After Maple and Lunar were desexed, then put back together, I could allow Buttons to get closer to them over time. I was worried that they would bite each other’s noses, but because Buttons had his nose bitten by Chester, he backed off when Lunar tried to nip him a couple of times through the fence, which confused Lunar. Buttons didn’t want to have his nose hurt again, which showed me that he is not a mean bunny, he is a gentle, sweet critter who just wants friends. He deserves that. He has proven to me during these two meetings that he will not hurt Maple and Lunar, but he will keep them in place. After these two meetings, Buttons is looking forward to spending time with Maple and Lunar, and vice versa. It’s really cute to see.
It’s also really good that Buttons is not a fast, energetic bunny. He has very limited energy bursts. This helped with their game of tag because he would stop and lay down, and they would come over to him and jump over him trying to get him active again. He would only play again when he had rested for a few minutes. I think the stress would have increased exponentially if he was an energetic bunny who could keep running.
It’s going to take a couple of days for Lunar to get brave again, but he will. He has never been put in his place before, he thought that he was going to be boss, but he had to learn that it wasn’t the case. What really helped was when my sister put the towel on him to calm him down. He stayed under there for a couple of minutes, able to completely stop and recalibrate. He came out a new man after that and even though he was still a little wary, he was willing to go up to Buttons and sniff him.
Just by watching their behaviour, none of the bunnies wanted to be mean, or fight with each other. I had heard stories of bunnies boxing each other, or ripping each other apart, so that’s what I was imagining. But no, it didn’t happen. This behaviour supports my theory that people understand bunny’s behaviour incredibly wrong.
Maple is a Diggy-Diggy!
I put the Little Ones in their enclosure the next day and left them alone for 15 minutes…
Maple dug a hole. It was the same size as she was and about 40cm deep. I moved the enclosure away from it so that she couldn’t continue with her art. She was happy that I found it, and was proud to show me.
I gave them a red soft bucket with sand instead, which I called the diggy-diggy bucket. But Lunar liked it more than Maple.
All Because of Ed Sheeran
My sister invited me to go to the Ed Sheeran concert in Melbourne at the MCG on Friday, 3rd. She had a spare ticket. Of course I said yes. Turns out it was the largest concert he had ever played, 110,000 people. Anyway, I had to leave the bunnies in the care of my family for 3 nights.
Upon my arrival home on the Sunday afternoon, I was told the bunnies missed me. Buttons thumped the first night because I didn’t play our nightly games. Maple was sad and Lunar didn’t want to talk to anyone.
From that, I knew I had to spend time with each bunny to let them know I was home again. It took a lot of hugs and snuggles before they forgave me for going away.
The break from bonding is a good thing. It gives them time to think about it. I found that it is important to give a break for a day or two after a stressful event.
In education, they call this a plateau, where the new information is left alone for a while and it solidifies in the brain. Rabbits need plateau time, even when learning tricks or simple rules.
There’s a whole article about how rabbits learn in the Health Library.
Day 2 – Monday 6th
I had decided while I was away, that I was going to put the bunnies together in a round pen for the whole day, every day from now on. I want them to be able to be together by the end of the week. A bit ambitious, but I’ll give it a go.
I decided to dive right in and start.
Whatever you do with bunnies, do it with purpose. Do it like you mean it. They can smell fear and anxiety.
I built a great big circle pen with a divide across the centre. I made sure to build the pen somewhere they had not been for a week or more.
I put buttons in first, I then put Lunar and Maple in the other side. They are used to seeing each other through the fence. They greeted each other good morning. Lunar and Buttons are OK with each other.
Maple appeared and didn’t change the dynamic between buttons and Lunar.
We left them to settle for a few minutes, because the Little Ones are used to being in this particular place in their green enclosure, so being out in the open was a bit scary for them.
We then removed the centre panel.
They were happy exploring each other’s sides.
After a while we put the shade cloth up. The bunnies still laid on either side of the fence, because that’s what they are used to.
Lunar decided to be brave and sniff Buttons. Lunar is easily scared, about anything and everything. I decided to sit on a chair in the pen and cuddle him. I put on the Bunny Calming music and they all settled down. Amazingly calm bunnies. Just chilling. Later that afternoon, they were quite close to each other and relaxing.
Thoughts
My concern about leaving them in the pen together for the full day was that they’d either like or hate each other by the end of it. But I thought that there is plenty of space in there and they can distance themselves from one another if issues arise. They did that in the start. Even Lunar and Maple separated themselves from each other for a little while.
Buttons acts old and grumpy, but I know it’s because he is letting the Little Ones know that he is not putting up with their silliness. He snaps at them and he did pull a little fur out, but he isn’t mean. It’s because he is letting them know to stay away from me while I’m in the pen. I belong to him and he gets jealous when Lunar and Maple are around me.
That is nothing to do with territory, or dominance, it’s to do with resources. I’m the food giver, so I am important.
Buttons threw his ears back and lunged at Lunar, because Lunar wanted to smell Buttons’ head. Buttons only did that because he was jealous of Lunar being closer to me. I told Buttons “No” and showed him the stop hand signal, which he has been perfecting for months. He stopped immediately and backed down. From that, he started to listen to me.
They lasted the whole day without many issues. The tiny things that did arise will subside over the next few days, when they realise that they will be together all day, every day.
Day 3 – Tuesday, 7th
I put them all in the same pen straight up in the morning. Buttons lunged at Maple and pulled a huge chunk of fur out. He seemed grumpy and I needed to spend time with him. To stop him from doing damage, I blocked him in a small triangle pen for about 2 minutes. I picked him up and put his harness on. I took him for a walk. It lasted about 5 minutes. I ended up cuddling him for about 45 minutes instead.
When he was put back in the bonding pen, he was calm. I realised from this that he was jealous. He wanted attention but didn’t know how to ask for it.
I put the fence up in the middle to separate them and let them chill out.
Day 4 – Wednesday, 8th
I put Buttons out first in the morning. I then brought him back in after about 10 minutes because it was disgusting weather with an icy south wind. He was thankful for being taken back indoors.
There wasn’t much bonding done this day. I classed it as a synapse building day, or a plateau day.
Buttons decided to dig a tunnel in his litter box. He spent all day completing that task.
I made a fleece tunnel for the bunnies and they played with it all day.
A cyclonic storm hit at about 2 in the morning. At about 4am we could hear a bunny thumping. A family member got up to check what was going on and found that the electricity had gone off earlier, and had turned back on, making a really bright light on the living room fan turn on. Maple was trying to tell us that the light was on and we had to turn it off. Such a clever bunny, no wonder her name is Maple McThumpybum!
Day 5 – Thursday, 9th
Idecided to take another tack. Instead of having an empty pen, I filled it with every tunnel and house I had. I put hay out and sprinkled food around. I purposefully gave a lot of resources, that way there couldn’t be any arguments about one bunny having more than another, which is why Buttons was chasing the Little Ones around previously. He was jealous that they had something he didn’t.
The bunnies played in the tunnels, ate and were 90% calm all day. Buttons did chase them around a little but a lot less than usual, he ripped some hair out. Poor Lunar.
I decided to play more bunny calming music, only a different video this time. Maple sat and listened, and played by herself. Lunar fell asleep, even with his eyes shut! Butty relaxed in a pipe and fell asleep.
Bunny calming music is unbelievable. I thought it was a gimmick, one of those things that simply can’t be true. But it works.
Although, I have found that my bunnies like piano, music box, or cello music more than environmental sounds, or other more up-beat music.
They were outside from 8:30am to 1pm. They would have been out longer, but it started to rain. I decided to collect Butty first, and then went back to collect Maple and Lunar. That way Buttons didn’t need to feel jealous that the Little Ones were put inside first. I’m trying to ease Buttons’ jealousy towards the Little Ones, and it seems to be working.
Being aware of the jealousy/resources thing is working a treat.
At bunny-time (from about 9:30pm-11:00pm), Lunar zoomied like a mad-man. He ran around his pen like a flash of lightning and a stack of loud footsteps. Maple just watched him go nuts from the litter box, chewing on hay. She had her zoomy time from about 10pm.
Day 6 – Friday, 10th
Well, today was a good day for the bunnies. Buttons didn’t chase the Little Ones at all. He lunged towards Lunar once as Lunar ran past the tunnel Buttons was in. Buttons had an evil grin on his face when he did that, because he is just doing it for fun now.
Lunar and Maple are much calmer, but still leaping out of his way. One bitten, twice shy.
The stupid amount of tunnels and hidey-holes have really eased the anguish the Little Ones felt towards Buttons.
Maple was happy in the afternoon and zoomied around jumping over Buttons and ducking in and out of pipes.
Right now, I would class them to be approaching 1/4 bonded.
This is my plan
| 1/4 | not scared, no bulgy eyes and no serious chasing/lunging, no more fur pulling, learning to share and touching noses |
| 2/4 | copying each other – i.e grooming at the same time, closer together |
| 3/4 | eating with each other, relaxed behaviour, laying around together |
| 4/4 | chilled buns in every situation |
Lets see if it works that way, and how long it takes.
Day 7 – Saturday, 11th
The bunnies were starting to get more comfortable with each other. Lunar is still on edge a lot though. Maple just runs around without a care in the world, doing her own thing.
I put a fresh clump of hay in the pen with some nibbles, and Maple was the first to dive into it. Buttons wandered over to have a look, and Maple simply stepped aside. No show of territory or dominance from Buttons. It was more like: “Oh, what have you found?”
I put the chair in the pen for something new. Of course Maple decided to test it out.
Later in the afternoon I found an old washing basket that I put bedding wood chips in the bottom and their hay from their pen on top. They all came to sniff it and check it out. Again, Maple was the first to explore the basket. Buttons watched. Then it was Buttons’ go. He didn’t chase Maple away, he waited his turn. Again, there was no show of territory or dominance. Lunar wanted a go too, but he doesn’t like jumping all that much. He circled it a couple of times. Then laid down behind it.
Lunar started to run away from me a couple of days ago, he usually came up to me for pats, but he tried to dodge me with everything. I realised he was jealous of me spending time with Buttons. He saw me carry Buttons outside to his pen and felt he wasn’t getting the same treatment. So, that evening I spent a lot of time with Lunar, giving him hugs and pats, and he settled down and loved me again.
Boy rabbits are jealous of each other.
Girl rabbits don’t care what boy rabbits do and think.
